I couldn't believe what i got for this essay (27/30) read it and see what you think..comments appreciated.thanks!

Describe a time when you were deeply embarrassed

The grey rain clouds cleared and gave way to a pale orange light which shone victoriously in the sky. Through the silver paned window of the classroom, sunlight filtered in and onto my scratched, dusty grey desk. I retrieved a mirror from my costly new Billabong sling bag and had to go through the rest of my cosmetics as I took out the shiny reflective item. I put it in front of my brown eyes and admired my new pink tinged with purple-gold dust eyesahdow.Perfect.I always tried to be perfect-in order to fit in, to be with the popular clique of the school-but, somehow or other, no matter how hard I tried, my secret would always be trying to escape. It was an undeniable burden which I had to carry.

I was an orphan- a squalid orphan. Although I had already been adopted by two loving foster parents there was still a void in my heart. No matter how fluxive things were when, my parents died, I could not bury the past. It was like a shell, in the vast Caribbean, being washed up on shore and pulled back again. If I told my girl friends, I probably would not have any. "Caitlin!" My thoughts were interrupted as I put away the mirror, only to stare in to the eyes of my friend, Joan.

She told me class was over and the two of us left the class together. Sunlight which was tinged pink from the top of the tinted window stencilled our shadows as we strolled along the corridors. My amazingly short denim skirt and black t-shirt with the word ‘popular’ in diamante attracted stares from the rest of the students. They did not know about my past, much less care. All they did was focus on here, and now-the present. My clear blue aquamarine file was in the process of being admired by Joan when it slipped and fell with a thud onto the dusty maple floor. A few pieces of paper slipped out, but the one which caught Joan’s attention was indescribable.

It was a letter of notification, for my parents, regarding my low results. Joan did not even flinch as I rearranged the papers into my now-messy file. Our walk to the end of the hallway seemed endless and it was as though the sudden breeze which came from beneath the exit had muted the earth.

The new day dawned in a haze of soft sunlight. Crimson light filled my room as I awoke to another day of school. There was an unspoken happiness in my house- after all, my parents had yet to discover my results. I put on my lucky emerald skirt and a long sleeved pink blouse. I seemed to have lost my sense of fashion-stunned by the anxiety and nervousness over my parents’ reaction to the results. As I applied layers of eyeshadow and mascara, the light white clouds began to show their darker shadows. Before I knew it, raindrops were falling ceaselessly, forcing me to hear their endless pitter patter on the window sill.

An occasional streak of forked lightning cut through the dark grey clouds as I stared blankly at the sky from the car. My father had already left for work and luckily, only my mother would have to hear the news. I rummaged through my bag- once again looking for my mirror. I had forgotten to apply my blush. I applied layers and layers of the soft pink powder-maybe, if I applied more, no one would recognise me. That was no more than a false hope.

I sat in the hallway, putting on a mask to those who waved-those who recognised me as one of the more popular girls. I sat cross-legged outside the classroom my mother was in, patiently waiting for her to emerge. Suddenly realising how mismatched y outfit was, I took my ebony, velvet jacket for my bag. I was in the midst of putting my jacket on when I heard a loud rumble of thunder. The shadow of raindrops clinging to the glass window covered my body-resembling spots, like those of a leopard. The purple wooden door gently creaked open.

A warm smooth hand touched my shoulder and as I turned around, I saw the other hand-grasping a stack of my exam papers. I looked at my mother’s expression. Her bloodshot eyes from a lack of sleep had begun to show and the furious look on her face quite much explained what was going to happen. I noticed her jaw clenching as I shifted nervously to the edge of the seat. She began reprimanding me, in the corridor, with the millions of students stopping to stare-to take a second glance, to see if it was really me, popular Caitlin.

She shouted all sorts of things at me –talking about how much she had sacrificed for my education. The floor would probably have swallowed me-if my mother had given so much as a pause to do so.I heard my name echo numerous times. My ears, which seemed to have been switched off suddenly awoke by the sound of another rumble of thunder. Then, I heard it.

‘You are nothing but a useless, lazy orphan! I should never have adopted you! Never! Let you spend all your days thinking about your parents death!’ All the student s walking pass the hallway stopped to stare. The looks on their faces, haunting. Deeply embarrassed, I began to blush with regret. My reputation, gone down the drain. That was all I cared about. Tears streamed down from my face. There would never be another moment as embarrassing as this. I felt guilt, embarrassment, anger and slight happiness all at the same time.

As I walked back to the car, I saw the friendship band I had given Joan on the grey floor. It was dirty and alone. The rain had made it damp and dirty grey. I watched it go further, and further, and further away as my mother drove me back home. I should have picked it up, the memory of my utmost embarrassment.

sprinkled in glitter.
4:40 PM


21 over 25 for History!!! happy happy joy joy. your good luck honestly worked..thankies!!!haha.The only reason i came to school was cos Mrs Siow is leaving!!!!!So sad!!!!
Missing you already Mrs Siow...*sob*
I was tearing..tearing!!!not crying//. She says she'll come back in december to visit...so long//.

Yeah..Teacher's day tomorrow! going back to primary school..well, cya! Gonna go type out my 27/30 essay. haha. i know, i know, too free. lol//.